After 23 years of marriage, I feel like my husband and I have weathered almost every trial a marriage can go through. We have had financial difficulties. We have gone through the loss of a child. My husband has seen me through the loss of both of my parents. We have children with health issues. We have even been the mother and father of the bride. When I look back, I wonder how we made it through. I see two kids who grew up together and didn't allow the storms to cause permanent disasters.
Now don't get me wrong.... there were times we almost threw in the towel. There were hurt feelings. There were major communication issues. There was doubt and times we didn't feel like a team. The one thing that helped us stick it out was the fact that we loved each other even when we didn't like each other.
It's not easy to survive the pressures of the world today. So many are calling it quits at the first sign of incapability. They don't want to WORK on their marriage. It is easier to separate than to put effort into solving the issues. It may be a difficult journey, but the reward of a loving relationship is worth all the labor pains you may have to experience as a couple.
I feel I should stop here and say that I realize there are relationships where abuse and infidelity make it impossible for a marriage to continue. These are not the marriages I am focusing on. I have not had to suffer through either of these issues and I thank God for that everyday. In my daily prayers, I pray for these who are hurting and I pray that God will bring restoration to their lives.
With that being said, I can say that if you are struggling in your marriage, but neither abuse or infidelity is the problem, then you need to get busy working through the contention in your relationship. Those vows you took on your wedding day were not just a commitment. They were a covenant with your Creator. It was your promise to your spouse and God that through all the rough times, you would still love and support one another. Do you remember those promises you made?
I would like to give you a little reminder.
As a wife, I know that there are days that make you feel like you are not loved and appreciated. I realize that some are not vocal with their feelings. Communication is HUGE in a marriage. If you are not expressing your thoughts, feelings, dreams and visions with each other, you will lose connection with your spouse. You will not be able to articulate what you need from one another. I implore you today to stop fussing and fighting with your loved one. Instead sit down and talk about your lives together. Choose to remember the good times and help each other through the tough times. I would even suggest repeating these vows to one another. It will help you rededicate yourselves to your marriage.
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.
~ Mark 10:9 ~
I will continue praying for marriages. I would ask that you pray for couples all over the world. Satan wants to destroy families. It is our job to stop him!